rambling about my pre and college years

I guess “they” were right when they said that college is were you find yourself and find myself I did.  It became increasing difficult to do as I did when I lived at home because the rules and regulations that had governed me were no where to be found. I was on my own and now I was living by my own rules and regulations. I had freedom and doing what I wanted was the best thing in life, so I thought.  I tried to make an conservative effort to continue living my live as I did before college, but the overwhelming power of freedom triumphed over all my efforts.  I promised myself that I was going to go home on the weekends so that I could attend church and do things like was doing before but that slowing came to an end.  I even tried going to church on Sundays in the downtown area and that too became an arduous task.

My world was changing. No! I was changing too.  Most of the things I thought I wanted were now things I did not want.  I thought I wanted to become an engineer but after a few years decided to study computer science instead.  I thought I had a handle on my life until my grades started to slip and I knew it was serious when I got a warning letter stating that I was be kicked out of school for low GPA.  I know why my studies suffered and I regretted that but not what I did to cause it to suffer.  I didn’t do anything that most college students hasn’t done during their college careers.  I drank, partied and just had as much fun as I could.  

I eventually got it together and began focusing on my studies.  I started to set ground rules, making goals and objectives for myself.  I started to realize why I was going to college not only to find myself but to become myself, including the good and the bad.  It was important to me and my family to successfully complete my degree because I would be the first in my immediate family to receive a degree from a four year institution and to also prove to myself that I could do it. The pressure was on now and I was creating most of it myself.  Though it was a difficult time in my life, I was okay with it the challenges ahead because pressure creates diamonds.

Reflecting on my college days now, I know I would have done things a bit differently.  Though I would do things differently, given the chance, I cannot denounce all the fun I had.  My advice to anyone entering college would be, work hard and make sure you grades are where they need to be before parting hard and responsibly. You want to live to write or talk about it with pride.


About this entry